CWW Week 11 - Forgiveness - Day 6

Forgiveness

Scripture: Ephesians 4:32 [NKJV]

“And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” 

Here we are at Day 6 of our week on forgiveness and there is a recurring theme running through the scriptures. Todays is one I would like to unpack piece by piece. Ephesians 4:32 is only a short verse but it packs a punch as far as understanding what forgiveness is all about.

“And be kind to one another,” 

I was at an anti-mandate rally in Canberra when I was approached by a man screaming obscenities at me. As he approached me spitting anger and hatred, I had very little time to prepare a response. I prayed that morning for a hedge of protection to be put around me. An ex soldier moved towards me to protect me but was not close enough to be there when the man arrived in my face.

I had no idea what his issue was with me, but I noticed that I went from a defensive posture to an open welcoming one. Obviously my prayer was working because I was trusting that my prayer had been heard. I made myself vulnerable because I have long held the belief that “my strength lays in my vulnerability.” Screaming at me with his spit hitting my face I just stood open to him. As he took a breath I managed to get a response in. “Are you alright mate?” I asked in a compassionate tone. He paused and stared at me. Our eye contact was unbreakable. The few seconds of silence led to me reaching out to him with my arms open and I hugged him.

 As he relaxed from his rigid cold and threatening stance, [it was like hugging a telephone pole] my arms around him tightened their grip and as I pressed into the side of his face I whispered “ I am hearing you, and what’s more I am feeling your pain brother. It’s going to be ok, we are all in this together.” He responded by dissolving into tears. So did some who had gathered around at the time.

 I was the aiming point of his anger and frustration but I was not the cause of it. He needed to lash out. I sensed that and gave him the healing response he needed. As I moved on in the tidal flow of hurting people, he remained being comforted by those around him. I had moved on a few meters and looked back to see if he was ok. He looked at me smiling and gave me a thumbs up and then patted his chest in a salute to me. God kept His promise that day as He protected me with His greatest asset for defence. Love and kindness.

“Tenderhearted.”

The Bible often mentions turning our hearts of stone into hearts of flesh. Cruel and unforgiving people are often referred to as ‘hard hearted,” or “cold hearted.” My question to anyone with a hard heart is this. ‘How is that working for you?’

I said recently that ‘the essence of your communication is in the response you get.’ If you keep getting aggressive or submissive responses to your conversations then chances are that the problem is in your delivery. A look or tone can turn a blunt instrument into a sharp object. The Holy Spirit infilling your character, will soften your heart and therefore your delivery. If your motives are based on love of others over self, then the frame around your conversations will be tender and reflected in your methods. Author Dr Tim Jennings said in a speech, ‘that when you are drowning in different truths from different sources, the best way to discern truth can be determined in the methods used by the teller. If someone is forcing, bribing or threatening then you can assume that their motives are not in your best interests.’

Pray daily for a tender heart of flesh. Ask God to replace your heart of stone and the climate around you in your relationships will change. I have ‘turned complaints into requests’ often when dealing with business people who have let me down and are now boxing me up with ‘company policy’ statements. When I shift my issues to their organisation and tell them that they must have a hard job enforcing these policies, I then ask if there is another way around the problem. I then turn an adversary into a team member and we work together to solve the issues so that everyone wins.

“Forgiving one another,”

Here I run the risk of repeating myself, but once again that may not be a bad thing. Again, as I pray for the Holy Spirit to be the light of my communication things change. One of these changes is now so obvious to me in my daily walk but it still astounds me how much better it makes my life.

When I am about to embark on a conversation that may have critical outcomes one of the first steps in my process which now happens automatically is a quick journey back to the past. Remember that I say the ‘past is a warehouse where we store wisdom and not an armoury where we keep weapons?” I quickly trawl through the archives to find a time when I did the same thing I am about to criticise someone else for. This realisation that we all make the same mistakes and we have done the same thing puts the perfect frame around forgiveness of others.

Forgiving one another brings peace and harmony. Lets not forget in our first weeks we talked about the ‘Beatitudes in Matthew 5. In particular verse 9 which tells us “Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall be called Sons of God.”

Why would they be called Sons of God? Because in their forgiveness to bring about the peace, they have demonstrated clearly the character of God as Jesus did when He walked among us. They have effectively become, in the Australian vernacular, ‘a chip off the old block,’ or, “he is his fathers son.”

“Even as God in Christ forgave you.”

Notice I underlined God in Christ? God is in Christ because God and Christ are one. We can avail ourselves of the same gifts of kinship with God when we invite the Holy Spirit, the other member of the nature of God, into our character to do the heavy lifting for us. In doing this and in keeping to Gods’ basic design principles for living, by obeying his laws we are better equipped to “have the testimony of Jesus.” People will see that we have a Christ like behaviour, that we are truly peacemakers.

As we close let us all remember yet again, the immortal words of Jesus Christ when He said in His dying breaths. “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

Questions

1. Are you ready to become a peacemaker in your life through forgiveness?
2. Can you think of ways today to change the essence of your communication?
3. Are you entirely ready to invite the Holy Spirit into your life to remind you and guide you of the gift of salvation given to you by Jesus on the cross?

Prayer.

Dear Lord, Papa God.

The strife and turmoil that hardens my heart is slowly killing me and my relationships. My heart has hardened and I admit this to you in repentance. Please Papa turn my heart from stone to flesh and examine my heart and change my character. Lord I pledge myself to this journey as though my life depends on it, because your Holy Spirit is telling me that it does. I am yours to lead Papa. Please lead me. This is my prayer in Jesus Holy name. Amen.

Graham Hood